Memory Is One Thing, Feelings Are Another

Photo of Jennifer Stanley

“I may not remember what we talk about….but I always remember how you make me feel.”

Here is a lesson I have learned for the adult children of parents with memory issues. It’s how your Mom or Dad feels that really matters to them.

Look, memory issues are now an established part of adult life. Memory issues that were once rare, are now common. And they bring adult children sadness and worry.
Why? Because we all remember the time we told Mom or Dad “I will always take care of you.” And now maybe that job has grown too large to do properly. Diet, medication, bathing, proper exercise, movement, and wandering can all become too much for one person to handle.

And yes, this causes guilt, because of the promise we made Mom or Dad years ago.

But here is the thing. Memory issues can quickly outstrip your ability to give Mom or Dad the care they need. And postponing professional care can actually cause more harm.

But your Mom or Dad will always remember how you make them feel. Which is the magical thing that I see happening here at The Willows. Mom or Dad are left feeling wonderful after your visit.

And that guilt you feel? It goes away, because you can see that care is professionally given 24/7, in a nurturing and engaging environment, specially designed for seniors with memory issues, and Mom or Dad are thriving.

On top of that, you can visit Mom or Dad as often as you like. And the love they feel from you during those visits…that is what stays with them. I see it all the time.

One of the most important parts of my job is this comfort I get to bring to families. I’m here to help, call me anytime at 641-485-1672.